Leo and I went over to my niece's house for dinner this evening, she was barbequeing steaks and had made macaroni and cheese, greens and green bean casserole. Out of the blue my brother (her dad) shows up. With him as always is his rottweiler Freida. Freida is a good dog but she is big and playful and doesn't know her own strength. And my niece Nichole has a toy poodle named Presley but we call him Parsley and my brother calls him Pepito or Pee Pee, I do not know why. Freida and Parsley get along famously and it's fun to watch them interact because of the massive size difference. Anyway. It's a barbecue and there are people all inside and out eating, and people kept giving Freida pieces of meat and other food, and then my grand niece Eraya who is 5 fed Freida some leftover fish from a restaurant they went to yesterday. I was right there and saw the whole thing. I didn't think Freida would eat the fish but she did, it had some kind of sauce on it and I bet it was pretty good at the restaurant yesterday. So I go into the kitchen to wash my hands and I come out into the living room to find it in total pandemonium. Freida had come in the house and barfed a pile of barf like I had never seen, it was huge! My grand niece Kristina chimes in with "God Frieda, what did you eat, a sock?" Nichole starts swearing because her nice clean carpet now has a giant pile of barf on it, and I head for the door. Outside I encounter my brother and say "You better get a shovel, Frieda just barfed", then, don't ask me why, I turned around and looked back, only to see little Parsley chowing down on the Giant Pile O Barf. Now Nichole is freaking out because not only does she have giant barf in her house but her little dog is making a meal out of it. Now I am practically running out to the side of the house so that I can crack up and not piss off any of my family. So Leo and I are sitting outside laughing and my brother comes around the corner with the area rug of barf and gets rid of it and after burying the huge barf pile he comes and sits down next to us. I cannot stop laughing at this point. Then Eraya, who is quite the entertainer in her own right, comes outside and says "I have a song for you", so she stands on a chair, and using a My Little Pony coloring book as a megaphone starts singing this at the top of her lungs:
"WHYYYYYYY DID FRIEDA BAAAAAAARF?
WHYYYYYYY DID SHE THROW UUUUUUUP?
SHE ATE SOME STINKY FIIIIIIISH
AND A POOPY DIIIIIIAPERRRRRR!
OH YEAH BABYYYYYYYY!
Apparently I was laughing so hard that I could not breathe and my brother had to tell Eraya, "Stop singing, you'll kill your aunt!"
Oh God I Will Miss Them.