My tenant Steve brought over the Weekly World News the other day. Did you know---apparently, God has a wife. Her name is Miriam, but she prefers to be referred to as Mrs. God. They would have been married sooner, but there was an argument over the prenuptual agreement that God had drawn up. They are depicted as your average married couple, although they have different interests. While Mrs. God likes to go dancing, God prefers to spend his time creating new universes. And while Mrs. God likes to shop, God would rather smite sinners and bestow forgiveness on people.
And you know it's all true, it has been confirmed by some bishop at the Vatican! Evidently they communicate with angels there. The reason this is all coming out now is that Mrs. God is writing her memoirs. Look for her book signing at a Borders near you!
I need to talk to my pastor.